Scars
Assanté Kassanani stood a slender six feet in her bath towel in front of the mirror. Her lithe body shone around the shoulders from the vitamin rich skin lotion she had massaged into her dusky skin to ease the knots out from another long day.
She looked at her unblemished face and traced a finger around her full lips; soft and plump, a smile hiding just behind them. She pressed the soft spot beneath her eyes and then with both hands drew imaginary circles around them, relaxing and breathing slowly as she did so. Her eyes were her favorite part of herself:someone sweet had recently called them feline. She loved, when the rare moments arose, to line her eyes with black and accentuate the look: exotic, feminine and cat-like. It brought out her high cheekbones in her softly lined face. Pulling her hair back into a tight ponytail, she fantasized that she looked like Cleopatra might have looked.
These thoughts; these features made her happy but, as was her need every day, she removed the towel from around her willowy form and allowed it to drop unchecked to the floor. She turned her body, allowing her eyes to follow the line of her shoulder blade to the first of her secrets.
An eight inch scar ran from her left shoulder in a diagonal line towards her spine,with two similar but smaller scars running parallel to it. The big scar was a dark pink color, raised like a plowed furrow in a field. The others could barely be seen in the low light but she knew they were there. Down towards her left hip a burn scar a foot long mottled her beautiful black skin into a peculiar, uneven blob. On the days she had to stand for long spells, it was like she could feel again the hot torch being pressed against her. She touched it, feeling the rough bumps and remembering well the man who left them there.
From back to front on her right side, a series of small, uneven shaped holes were dotted in a large semi circular fashion down her body and down her side, like some kind of moon landscape. Carefully she counted them turning her body into the light so that each scar was seen and remembered.
She had been twenty-six years old in '94, studying hard, trying to get placement in a respectable school to learn Psychology. It had been her passion from the moment she read a book about the brain. Unfortunately, Rwanda was about to explode as tensions between the Tutsi and Hutu were about to spill out into the neighborhoods. Friends would betray friends and then even God seemed to desert them. Hiding in churches was no safe haven as priests turned in their flock.
From Kigali she had somehow escaped, a Tutsi woman alone, but along the way she picked up her scars. Some of them she did not wear on her body as a record of history, instead they were rooted in her memories. She had family once: parents,brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts and three grandparents but during that genocide, and the terrifying flight for their lives, they had all been killed, taken from her or simply lost. She prayed for them every night.
Alone she had arrived in Tanzania, having borne the ignominy of repeated rape at the hands of the man who supplied her transportation. And finally, with much effort and heartache behind her, she had managed to secure a way out and a trip to the United States.
Filled with renewed purpose granted only to those few who survive genocide, she worked harder than ever to earn her way into College. Waiting tables, cleaning dishes and volunteering at the Orphanage at one time or another and sometimes all together. It was a hard time but nothing as hard as she had already survived. And she had survived.
Finally,she picked up her degree in Psychology, specializing in child psychology, her intelligence and hard work making her trip through college a short one. And from there another short journey to where she now stood, naked in front of a mirror in her small but comfortable apartment in a nice area of town.
She smiled as she remembered her graduation and took two steps from the mirror to her dresser and picked out the underwear she had chosen specially for tonight. Hanging nearby was a dress she had also taken extra care with. Tonight she would dine with the new man in her life and, if he could get past the scars, she had something beautiful to share with him.
GSY




